Mama Musings: 5 loaves and 2 fishes

A personal story

Yesterday we had a bake sale for our homeschool co-op, hoping to raise money for field trips and activities throughout the year.  Between what I spent on ingredients and the time spent baking all morning and at the sale, I really didn’t feel like I got a good enough return for what I invested (and that’s despite some beautiful people being generous!).  We had lots of goodies left over at the end of the sale, so as a last-ditch effort to get a little more out of our time and money I took cookies home, thinking we could build some plates and see if people would like to make a donation to our group for a plate of cookies.  It was crickets in response.  Feeling exhausted (the 9 month old hasn’t been sleeping very well), I turned to my Heavenly Father in prayer, describing my feelings and saying how I was so tired of working so hard to feel like I’m not getting much in return.

The baby soon woke up from where she was sleeping in her carseat, so I closed my prayer and went in to put my simple turkey meatloaf dinner on the messy table, deciding I would freeze the cookies and if anyone happened to reach out I could still build them a plate.  As I was putting the cookies in freezer bags, I had the thought that this supply could be 6-7 weeks of Family Home Evening treats for us (Family Home Evening is a get-together my family has on Monday evenings with a spiritual thought or lesson, prayers, primary song(s), treat, and activity.  We typically rotate assignments for each week). I realized that there could still be a return on my time in the form of several treats already baked for those nights, which will be perfect for the busy birthday and holiday-filled season we have coming up.  I noticed that a fresh perspective can help us multiply our loaves and fishes (or time spent making cookies).  I felt like the Spirit helped me see a new way that this effort my friends and I had made could bless my life.  The perspective shift also gave me the comfort and energy boost I needed to work together with the kids to get the house picked up before my husband Miles came home from a Swat Competition.

One way God multiplies what we have is gratitude

This morning I had another opportunity to practice with this principle.  Baby Emily did not sleep well again and this morning I was sooo tired.  Miles graciously took her upstairs to allow me to catch another half an hour of rest. When it was time to get up I turned quickly to prayer, recognizing that I could easily snap at the kids in impatience or feel resentful all day due to how tired I was.  As I was asking Heavenly Father to multiply my inadequate sleep to something sufficient, I noticed the cool, sweet morning air wafting through our bedroom window directly above our bed. ‘Ohh,’ I thought, ‘the air smells sooo good. I am grateful for the morning air.’ Noticing how refreshed I felt after that moment of gratitude, I realized that being grateful is one of the ways we can multiply our loaves and fishes. I also got excited because I thought I would just be asking for and receiving help from Heavenly Father, I didn’t anticipate that He was going to teach me about how to do it as well!  My mind was turned towards the loaves and fishes accounts in the bible and realized that it was sometimes recorded that Jesus gave thanks before blessing and breaking the bread.  Mark 8:6 reads, “And he commanded the people to sit down on the ground: and he took the seven loaves, and gave thanks, and brake, and gave to his disciples to set before them;”

I have long wondered about our mealtime blessings on the food.  What do we need it for? Yes of course, it’s good to take a moment to be thankful and to reconnect with God but why the blessing?  It’s not often our food is going to be poison or literally need to be multiplied. Reading the account of the Savior blessing the food in these instances showed me a powerful pattern: we choose to be thankful and then we ask for the Lord’s blessing to make more out of our mealtime than what’s there–more communion with family, better nutrition absorbed by our body, enough if we have little, etc.  The ways He can multiply what we have brought to the table-both literally and figuratively–are numerous.

Our life’s moments can be as a sacrament, in remembrance of Him

I studied this pattern some more.  First gratitude, then seeking for the Lord’s blessing, then breaking up what we have to apportion it where we can.  As I come to Him with my days filled to overflowing with responsibilities and needs, I can first be grateful for what I have, then ask Him to make more of it, then set to work dividing my time as best I can. The words of thanks, bless, and break reminded me so distinctly of our weekly sacrament ordinance at church and I realized if we will, we can consecrate our lives to point us to that ordinance and to the Savior.  This is so much bigger than my sleepiness being softened by the Spirit to help me live my day more peacefully.  This is a way of life, a walk we take together with the Lord.

Heavenly Father has already made so much more out of today then I could have on my own.  I am looking forward to seeing what else He will teach me about this principle, and how He will multiply the meager offerings I bring to Him.  In reverence I will seek to bring more of my days as a sacrament with thankfulness, requests for heavenly support, and my own sacrifice/offering.

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